Well! At the start of this book, poor Connie never really enjoyed any sexual encounter. It’s generally described as a chore from the start. Even when she got married, with the limited time she got to spend intimate time with her husband before he was crippled in the war, she still seemed to consider sex as just one of those duties that a wife is to perform.
So later, Connie takes a lover in Michaelis. When she took the time to make sure she was satisfied with him, he actually complained to her that it took so long! As if it were a choice! It just goes to show that women always have to put the extra work into achieving anything (pleasurable or otherwise), whereas the men seem to think they’re just entitled to come-and-go as they please. (This isn’t exclusive to sex – how often in other walks of life does the woman have to do twice as much to achieve the same result…?)
And then, she begins to see the gamekeeper Oliver Mellors. Only when she begins to have a regular intimacy with the same man over a period of time, does she finally begin to enjoy herself. It takes familiarity, comfort, & both an emotional AND physical connection before Connie can relax and believe that this is “normal” and pleasurable.
With the exception of some particularly coarse language (some of the four-letter-words which, in my opinion, should not really be considered as offensive as they’re purely descriptive – and accurate) this is a story about a woman finding out what it means to truly be a woman, sexual discovery is just as important in the maturity and growth of a woman as other world and social skills.
It should be noted that this novel does NOT endorse promiscuity, nor does it really teach SAFE sex; Connie was hoping to become pregnant, and at the time of writing sexually transmitted infections were neither well known nor understood.
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